How to Turn Small Talk Questions to Your Advantage, Part 1

How to Turn Small Talk Questions to Your Advantage, Part 1

Eliminate Small Talk Questions with Dynamic Answers

If you haven’t been getting the *Free* Step-By-Step Guide to Dating Smarter and Finding Love Faster, get it now because we’ve been working on how to eliminate Small Talk Questions by making declaratory statementsstarting conversations in the middle, and asking questions of substance.

(I’ll wait while you sign up… It’s in the right sidebar.)

The problem is that even though you know that Small Talk Questions are conversation killers, your potential partner does not.  That means that when you overcome your First Move Fear to approach a potential partner, he or she is still going to ask you with the same old boring questions:

  • Where are you from?
  • Where did you go to school?
  • Where do you live?
  • What do you do for fun?

The way you answer these questions will separate you from non-Villagers.  (Once you grab the Free Dating Guide, you’ll get the Villager reference.)


Most people don’t see anything wrong with Small Talk Questions so they answer the questions literally.  For example:

When asked, “Where are you from?” a non-Villagers might respond, “I’m from So-And-So town.

When asked, “Where did you go to school?” a non-Villagers might respond, “I went to So-And-So high school.

When asked, “Where do you live?” a non-Villagers might respond, “I live in So-And-So neighborhood.

Do you see the problem?

Those literal one sentence answers don’t move the conversation forward.  Each answers just invites another Small Talk Question.  You can and will do better than that!


Get out your Action Plan.  This is important…

You cannot stop other people from asking you boring Small Talk Questions but you have a choice when you answer them:  You can either stall the conversation with a one sentence answer or you can deepen the conversation with a Dynamic Answer.

If you’re saying to yourself, “Easier said than done,” you’re right.

When I tell the participants in my live workshops to respond with Dynamic Answers, they all see the value in it, but they struggle to implement it.  How do I know?  I give them an exercise to write a response to a Small Talk Question and then watch them struggle as they realize that Dynamic Answer aren’t as simple as literal one sentence answers.  It is a skill that needs to be practiced to be mastered.

So what is a Dynamic Answer?  (You may want to write this down.)

At the most basic level, a Dynamic Answer is a response that interests the listener because it contains more than the simple fact that was asked for.  A good Dynamic Answer tends to:

  • Answer the question, but not necessarily explicitly
  • Contains a story or explanation

Don’t freak out!  I know this doesn’t make much sense yet, but it will.  In the next article, you’ll read some of my personal Dynamic Answers and learn how to write your own.  Be ready!  It’s the sort of article that can change your life.

(You can get it delivered to your inbox by grabbing the Free Dating Guide in the right sidebar.)


  • You can’t stop others from asking you Small Talk Questions
  • The best response is a Dynamic Answer
  • Dynamic Answers respond to the question indirectly by including a story or explanation
  • You’ll read my Dynamic Answers and learn how to write your own in the next email

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Jeremy Hamburgh
Jeremy Hamburgh
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PS:  This is a chapter in Hitchcraft Dating’s *FREE* STEP-BY-STEP GUIDE TO DATING SMARTER AND FINDING LOVE FASTER.  You can get it quickly and easily at by clicking here.   You also get other great freebies:

  • FREE articles loaded with actionable dating tips and advice sent directly to your inbox
  • A buy-one-get-one FREE certificate for private coaching

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  1. […] email may have left you a bit confused, maybe even frustrated.  We discussed the importance of giving Dynamic Answers to Small Talk Questions but I didn’t give you useful guidance for how to do that.  That’s […]

  2. […] Are you answering Small Talk Questions with Dynamic Answers? […]

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